Sacrifice Realized

Don't you just hate it when people tell you they're going to do something and then fail to follow up with the end results? I wouldn't do you that way now would I?

Okay, maybe I did.

For quite some time I've been intending to report on the fallout that came from a crazy decision I made back in April.  A decision that involved banning my kids from all forms of media during the school week. (Click here if you would like to see what led up to this insane idea of mine!)

To be honest, I figured it wouldn't be easy. My kids didn't like the new restrictions, so there would be resistance. I expected to hear a lot of "I'm bored." I expected that I'd have to supply some alternatives. Like smokers trying to quit the habit. Giving them chewing gum and things to do to fill in the time they'd normally spend on cigarette breaks. Kids smoking, what a terrible image that brings to mind.  Hmmm...well anyway, you get the idea.

But what I wasn't prepared for was this: they kept showing up by my computer desk, wanting to...TALK TO ME!...(gasp!!!)

What the?!?

Okay, so at first this totally unnerved me. What were they doing there? I mean really? Usually I had to chase them down for a conversation and this so called conversation at best consisted of one or two word answers. They were always too busy for me.

Well guess what? They weren't busy now. After my initial shock wore off, I realized that they suddenly had all kinds of time on their hands and they wanted to spend some of it with Mama. Whoot! It was great. I turned away from my computer and listened intently, answered their questions-yes, they actually asked me questions, they wanted my take on things. It was both bizarre and wonderful.

But then after a few days, the novelty wore off. I hate to say this but things took a serious turn for the worse. The fighting between siblings reached epoch proportions. The house, oh my goodness, the house. It changed from slightly messy to an official disaster area. Obama came and pronounced it so. (hehe)

And it seemed no matter what activities I lined up, my sweet children were far more interested in remaining on their current path of seek and destroy-whether it be the house or each other, they were determined to get the job done.

Even my thoughts were violated. You might be able to relate to this. You're deep in thought. Maybe while you're changing out laundry, maybe cleaning the toilet, or even sitting at your desk writing a post. You're really getting into it. For myself, it's story ideas. So I've built layer on layer, mentally growing this great story in my head. And then I hear "Mommy, such and such hit me," or "Mom can we look up Black Ops on your computer." (yea right, like that's gonna happen)

My idea flops, splatting back into the grey mass from which it came. Please, please, get out of my head!

Without media to entertain them, I was constantly interrupted and my workload increased ten fold.

A few weeks ago I was considering military school. Do they accept 2 year olds into the program?
Then we'd be talking. Ship all four of them off and give Mommy a reprieve from all this craziness.

Okay, so this was pure fantasy, in reality I would miss them terribly if they weren't here with me.

But the status quo simply wasn't hacking it. Since shipping them off wasn't a viable solution, and I wasn't about to back down on the new media rules, I decided I needed to form new habits as well.  I guess my children weren't the only ones making sacrifices. I began working on story ideas at night after they were all in bed, and tried to make myself more available to them throughout the day.

With work, things have slowly settled down since then, and they have more or less fallen into the swing of things. They're more apt to use their imagination through play, they're reading more, and also helping around the house.

But now summer is here, throwing a wrench in it all!  And of course, my eldest was under the assumption that since school was out for the summer, the media rule was rendered null and void. Not!

I'm determined to avoid a repeat of last time, to stay ahead of my brood. I've gone over the new summer rules, giving a little more ground than I'd like. From 12pm -2pm they may watch TV or play video games. I figure this is a time of the day when it's pretty hot outside anyway, so this will help keep them out of the sun. They also get one movie at bedtime. This way I can easily keep them on the same school routine without any arguing. Like I said, it's more than I like, which is a bummer. But I suppose it's better than them being glued to the TV all day.  :P

So...what are you all doing this summer? Any ideas for keeping the kids busy?

*If you're arriving from a blog hop please leave a comment so I can pay you a visit! Blog hop links are located under the blog hop tab at the top of the page.*

Sacrifice

This week I had an epiphany.  Unfortunately, it wasn't the kind I had been hoping for. Mary didn't float on celestial clouds with the message that I, out of millions, had been given special dispensation--that I didn't have to stick to my lenten sacrifice.  There was no tempting pot of peanut butter to be found in her spectral hands.  No, like everyone else, I'm still on track and am abstaining from my addiction-- second only to Diet Coke, peanut butter is my all time fav. You can bet your biscuits that come Easter morning you will find me in the pantry with a big spoon and a full jar of Jif. It will be mine! Oh, yes, it will be mine! (insert maniacal laugh)


No, the message didn't come in the form of a holy vision, instead it came in the form of a question.

On Wednesday, two of my kiddos had their annual doctor's appointment.  Everything was going as badly as I'd feared, if not worse. As the nurse went down the standard list of questions such as: do you have safety gates, do you have the poison control number, do they eat their veggies, etc... my four darling children ran amuck. Wrestling, arguing (rather loudly), on the examination table, off the examination table--shredding the paper. One's digging in the trash can in search of old lollypop sticks to suck on while another watches a cartoon on the ipad (again, rather loudly).  Six people in one very small examination room is never a good idea, especially when four of those people haven't mastered the skill of remaining still for more than three seconds at a time.

It was all I could do not to run screaming from the room, claiming I didn't know who those impudent, savage children belonged to- but their mother really needs to get a handle on them. Maneuvering my kids two at a time is nothing like all four of them at once without the expanse of a house to buffer the volume. Anyway, shouting above the mayhem, the nurse asked about television. How many hours a day do they spend watching TV or playing video games. And the question gave me pause. Because the answer, in all honesty, is too many. Countless. I had to wager a guess, and it wasn't pretty. I mean, my four year old was currently watching Tangled over on the examination table--the telly followed us everywhere.  Had I turned into one of those moms who uses TV as a sitter? I must admit, it's much easier to be around them when they're staring zombie eyed at a screen instead of punching each other and yelling for help every time I turn around.

Yet that simply isn't good enough.  Like any other caring parent out there, I want my children to not only have what I had as a child, but I want it to be better.  And as of Wednesday afternoon, they had so much less.

So Thursday I made a tough decision.  Television and video games (and yes, even including the Nintendo 3DS, thank you very much) are restricted during the school week.  They've been banned.

With collected resolve ( I practiced this in the mirror before going to pick them up from school) I notified them of the new house rule. At this point, all hell broke loose in the car. To my dismay and alarm, I would have to say I actually witnessed gnashing of teeth through my rear view mirror.  Apparently the lack of Pokemon and Olivia being piped into our living room was the end of the world. In no uncertain terms I was told that I was "ruining their life".  This actually made me smile.  Finally, I'm doing something right.

The lamenting continued all the way home, at which point I sent the two eldest to their rooms until they could speak to me in a courteous tone.  Despite the closed doors, I had the displeasure of hearing them up there, hollering and howling.  You'd think I'd chopped off an appendage or something.  I began to view it as some kind of detox, like their little bodies were being purged of some sort of poison.  After a few minutes, my eleven year old braved leaving his room but couldn't still his tongue, so had to be sent back two or three times, the eight year old didn't come out for hours.

I was stoic, refusing debate or discussion. Last night my house was ruled by a dictator.  And I'm fine with that, because after the crying and belly aching, after the shock of the news wore off, something wonderful happened.  My kids began to play with each other.  It was as if a veil had been lifted and they suddenly noticed there were other potential playmates in the room.  The fond memories I hold dear from my childhood came to mind. Climbing trees, riding bikes, reading, running and rolling in the grass, frolicking in the sun, each day promising a new adventure.

With this new opportunity, my children will have this, they'll have those warm joyous memories of carefree days, and because of this one solitary 'sacrifice', someday down the road they may find themselves bestowing the same precious gift upon their own children.